Jesus replied, “You do not realize now what I am doing, but later you will understand.” -John 13:7
Have you ever prayed one of those, “Why Lord?” prayers? You know, those prayers of desperation from hearts that deeply long to trust God, but can’t seem to understand what He is doing or where He is in the midst of your troubles. You know, the kind of prayer that Jesus prayed on the cross when He cried out, “Eloi, Eloi, lama sabachthani? (My God, My God, why have you forsaken me?). The kind that Mary and Martha prayed when she ran to Jesus in tears and said, “Jesus, if up had been here, my brother would not have died!” The kind that Abraham probably muffled under his breath as he walked up the mountain to sacrifice his only son as God commanded him to do. The kinds that David prayed as outlined throughout the book of Psalms when he ran from cave to cave hiding for his life after he was anointed to be king of Israel.
Have you ever prayed a “why Lord?” prayer? I have! In fact, I have prayed them many times in many different ways, and many times, the Lord responded with the verse above. I often heard him whisper to my desperate heart, “You do not realize now what I am doing, but later you will understand.” For many years, I hated that response! It was not good enough for me! I needed to understand now why I did not get that job, why the relationship had to end, why the relationship could not begin, why my family did not support me in my decision to accept God’s call on my life, why my boss would not approve my time off to go on the mission trip, why he did not spare my friend’s child’s life, why, why, why! I thought I needed to know, but He knew I couldn’t handle knowing just yet, so He called me to just trust and wait.
After many months and years of waiting, my prayers soon changed to “Thank You Lord” prayers! Prayers where I thanked Him for keeping me from potentially harmful relationships, for teaching me to trust Him when I had no one else to run to or depend on, for strengthening me and my loved ones through life’s hardest trials, for closing doors so that I would have the time to enjoy the amazing things and people He brought into my life, for birthing amazing ministries out of seemingly hopeless situations, etc. You see, I did not realize then what the Lord was doing, but later I understood. My mind had to be renewed, and my heart transformed before I could really see clearly and understand.
I do not know what trials you are facing today, or what “why Lord?” prayers you are crying out to God, but I pray that you are encouraged by Jesus’ words in John 13:7; “you do not realize now what I am doing, but later you will understand.” The Lord loves us with an everlasting love and longs to see us completely satisfied in Him, but we are reminded in Isaiah 55:8, “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord.” We see in part, dream in part, and pray in part, but He sees the full picture! We are confined by time and space, but He is not! He sees the end from the beginning; He created us and knows everything about us, especially what is best for us. Will you trust Him enough to accept not understanding what He is doing right now? Will you trust Him enough to let Him take the driver’s seat in your life? Will you trust Him enough to patiently wait in faith as your mind is renewed and heart transformed so that you may understand? Will you wait until later?
Grace and peace be with you.
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